Tag Archives: transition

Quit Planning–Start Acting

Every year on January 1 people all over the world make New Year’s Resolutions.  Forbes reports that an average of 8% of people achieve their New Year’s Resolutions. EIGHT percent!!

Psychology Today reports that people who set goals, write them down and ask for accountability succeed nearly 75% of the time.

What is the difference between a New Year’s Resolution and a Goal?  Commitment. Saying “I will” instead of “I want to” is committing to action, not just dreaming and hoping.

We all need to dream. We all need to hope. But it doesn’t stop there. 

I dream often of having the skinny body I did many years ago, even while eating my latest batch of chocolate cookies fresh out of the oven. Dreaming won’t bring the body back – only acting on the commitment to exercise and change my eating habits.  Not just for a day or two, but to a lifetime commitment.

Opening a business where I would coach women who desire to move forward from where they are now to where they and God desire her to be means more than dreaming. I can visualize a schedule filled with clients, speaking engagements and an active blog post. That does not make it come to reality.

Making it a reality is overwhelming. There is such a large chasm between the desire and the picture in my dreams. Do you relate? Is there a chasm in front of you as well?

This past Christmas I purchased a jigsaw puzzle for my family to work on while visiting.  We each have our own way of working on a jigsaw puzzle as far as placing pieces, sorting the unused ones, etc; but there is one thing we all agreed on – set out and position the border pieces first.

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I apply the same to moving forward in my dream. Whether through using a coach of my own to help me go deeper into my desires, by journaling, through a vision board, or any other method that helps me focus, I outline the outer borders. What does I desire in the end? What values will I maintain? What ethical choices will I stand firm on? Where will I say no?

Then it’s time to sort the puzzle pieces and slowly, one by one, put the pieces into place until a full picture is presented. There were many interruptions along the way but we did finally put all the pieces together. That is, all the pieces except the one that was missing from the box.

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Now that I have clarified my dreams and desires I add color as each step brings the dream toward a reality.

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The process is slow moving for me; for others the pieces fall in place quickly.

The important thing is to remember that even a baby step is still a step forward. Stay committed. Keep moving forward.

What do you do to stay focused? How to you return to your efforts after interruptions occur? What happens when you find a piece is missing?

What dream will you commit to making a reality in 2017?

What Color Do You See? A story of perspective

Several years ago a friend was visiting my home. We sat out on the back deck drinking iced tea and catching up on our lives.

During a lull in the conversation my friend commented on the pretty yellow roses along the fence line. I yellow_rose_sm_clrlooked out there. Yes, there were pretty roses I had worked hard to plant along the fence line, but they weren’t yellow. Thinking she probably just misspoke, I didn’t say anything. Conversation continued.

A bit later she mentioned the yellow roses again. “You want to see them up close?” I asked. We stepped off the deck and walked along the fence, looking at the various flowers. When we stopped at the roses I asked her what color they were, she again said yellow. At that point, I was really confused. We were looking at the same rose, from the same distance, and she was seeing a yellow rose where a red rose resided.

As I looked at her face I noticed her sunglasses. “Would you take off your sunglasses for a moment please” I red_rose_sm_clrasked. She did and quickly explained, “The rose is red!”

She was wearing a pair of sunglasses with a thick amber tint, altering the color viewed all around her. Once she removed the tinted lens, she could see clearly the red rose.amber_glasses

Working with a life coach can benefit by helping to change the lens you look through. A life coach will listen intently, ask powerful questions from your disclosure, and help you look at circumstances from another angle, with a different lens. This allows you to determine for yourself how you wish to proceed with a clear image and refocused path.

Is it time to ‘take off your tinted glasses’’

NEED INPUT

Do you remember the movie “Short Circuit”?  It is a very cute movie made in the mid 1980s about an experimental robot that becomes intelligent.  Upon escaping into the world it seeks out INPUT. It wants to learn.

The phrase “input, more input” became a fun mantra as my children were growing up; signaling more information was needed.

One of my daughters loves to gather input before making a decision. She is not like her mother, who, on many occasions, has been known to make quick decisions without all the details and regretted the results. Grown now, with a family of her own, she started as a young teen asking for me to ‘listen’ to her thought process.  “Mom, I don’t want you to tell me what to do; I don’t want you to fix it. I want you to listen, to hear how I came to this resolution, and help me to see if there is something I have not considered that may affect the outcome.”

Wow, where did she get to be so smart?!?!?

This is one way to describe how I work as a life coach. You have to make your own decisions. You have to live with the consequences of any action you take or don’t take.

But you don’t have to go it alone. As your life coach I will listen to you. I will ask deep questions for you to consider. I will repeat back what I hear you say. Did I hear correctly? Do you want to explore that more? 

As the client, you have control of the direction. You have the right to say,”No, I don’t want to go there” or “Let’s go another direction” or “Yes, I do”. 

Some people can work with a life coach for just a few sessions pursuing deeper understanding of a change that is on the horizon. Some of those changes could include: empty nest coming up, planning for a job change, balancing work and home, stretching your comfort zone, and so much more.

Are you seeking ‘INPUT’ as you explore your next step? I’d love to discuss this with you further.

Time For Change

Spring time is beginning to show itself here in the Midwest. The grass is starting to green and grow, my husband is already looking at the lawn mower to wake it from it’s winter slumber.  Perennial plants are showing tips of green as they yawn and burst through the ground. Rain comes often.

Spring is a sign of change; a change in seasons.  Change is all around us.  I am a creature of habit and find myself a bit reluctant to change.

When a change is suggested in routine my first thought is “Why?  Are we changing just for the sake of change or will the change be beneficial?”  I like routine.

So when I desire a change in myself, I stand back and challenge it.

Taking training to become a Professional Life Coach through PCCI I learned a lot about how to approach change, face it, and move forward.

The most effective learning tool was the use of a coach. During the training I experienced personal coaching. I found that having someone listen deeply to what I was saying, asking me questions helping me to delve deeper into what I truly desired. I faced my fears, my concerns, found hidden desires, and made a commitment to myself.

I realized I was responsible for my own decisions. If I do things because it will please others, I am not fully committed. If I do something because someone told me I ‘should’ then they have made the decision for me. I do not accept ownership. With the coaching conversation I examined my ultimate goal.  It looked so huge, could I truly achieve it? Working together, I created S.M.A.R.T G.O.A.L.S.

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Like opening the box of a huge jigsaw puzzle we opened the package together and looked at the final picture. Through questions and looking within myself the big picture was broken down into attainable working sections. First, gather the pieces to make the outer border. Now sort the pieces into smaller working areas, focusing on one area, then another while keeping the big picture in mind.  With a coach reminding me of my ultimate goal I was reminded of what was important and even found a few things that I thought were important really that were not. By breaking down the ‘big picture’ I could more clearly see the “whole picture”.

Are you ready to move forward but feel stuck? Would a life coach help? 

· Do you want to grow and change?

· Have  you made efforts to change within the past year?

· Are you capable of thinking about the future?

· Are you open to learning?

· Are you committed to making changes?

· Are you willing to learn from others?

· Are you willing to take risks?

· Are you willing to restructure your life if necessary?

If you answered YES to the questions above, I would like to speak with you.  Check out more by exploring other pages on this website then submit a request to schedule a no obligation meeting via the MOVE FORWARD page. 

Let’s break down that big picture into attainable steps, empowering you to bring all the pieces together in a manner that will help you achieve your goals.

New Year’s Resolution or Disillusion

Did you make a New Year’s Resolution last year? How did it go?

If you like the majority of people you set it aside within the 1st 6 weeks of the year. Maybe you went a little longer. Perhaps you of the small percentage that stuck to it. If so, congratulations!

Not completing your resolution as hoped does not make you a failure. It makes you human.

So what about that change you wanted to make in your life? Is it too late, too far fetched, too unreachable?

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How important is it for you make that change?  Do you really want it? How hard are willing to work for it?

So often the change desired is B*I*G, so big it looms into a mountain before us – immovable. A few steps motorhome_traveling_mountains_md_clrare taken toward it, but it is just to large to climb.

Here are some steps to climbing that mountain.

  • Don’t climb alone. Find someone you trust and respect to climb with you. Someone who will hold you accountable.  (Ecc 4:12) (Prov 15:22)
  • Make the mountain a molehill.  Look at the overall goal as a large jigsaw puzzle. Break it down into workable pieces. Work a portion a time, bringing the full picture into focus. (Zec 4:10)
  • Plan ahead. Mountain climbers don’t wake up one day saying ‘today I will climb a mountain’. They prepare, build up muscle, collect and pack supplies.  What do you need to do to prepare? (Prov 21:5)  (Prov 31:15)
  • Set your mind on the goal. Make visual reminders and signs of encouragement around you to help keep the ultimate goal in mind. (Phil 3:13-14) (Ps 37:4) (Luke 14:28)
  • Learn to say NO. Saying ‘yes’ to one thing means saying ‘no’ to another. Learn to say ‘no’ to things that will take you away from your goal. (Gal 6:5) (Tit 2:12)
  • Forgive yourself. Stepping away doesn’t mean defeat. It means you stepped away. You can choose at this point to accept as defeat your faltered step or you can get up and start again.  You are already several steps in. Pick up where you left off and continue to move forward. Consider it a pit stop on the journey. (1John 1:9) (Acts 3:19) (Rom 5:1)

classic_convertible_road_md_whtNow, what are your plans for the New Year? You are about to begin a journey. Look out the windshield, not the rear view mirror, and move forward. Accept every accomplishment and hold to it. Take pit stops when needed, then continue on. Your destination awaits you.