Tag Archive | perspective

Get A Life…Coach

(I recently presented this as a speech at my local Toastmasters Club)

I have heard it said, “If you don’t have a vision, you can never be focused in a direction.”

I wonder then, how do you set a goal, and once set what propels you to consistently move in that direction?

Perhaps, like me, you try searching the internet. This is fine, except for those times I don’t really know what I need to search for.

I ask friends and family. However, their answers are given from their own life perspective and experiences which may not quite align with mine.

To move forward I found I needed to look within myself.

How do I do that? In walks my introduction to a ‘life coach’.

You may have heard the term ‘life coach’ – you may even know someone who is a life coach. As with any other profession, there are various styles. Let me introduce you to Life Coaching as I use it in my own practice.

The International Coach Federation defines coaching as partnering with clients in a manner that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential; in other word – working ‘from the inside out’ rather than ‘from the outside in’.

My daughter, unknowingly, demonstrated to me a life coaching technique when she was a teenager.

She would come to me and say, “mom, I don’t want you to tell me what to do, I don’t want you to fix it, I want you to listen, to hear what I have thought through, and let me know if you see anything I may have missed or need to consider”

As a life coach, that is what I do. I listen. And I ask questions. I help you see what you are looking at from a different angle.

Last year over the Christmas holidays I opened a jigsaw puzzle and set it out. There were 5 of us working on this puzzle at the same time and this is what I learned: we had the picture in front of us and were in agreement of what the end goal was – to make these pieces look like that picture; however, each of us had our own method of reaching that goal. We all started out the same – find the outer edge pieces and make the border. But then, we each went our own way of working through the process. Jon took a piece and worked methodically along pieces already in place and tested to see if it fit, then moved on to another piece. Angela looked for pieces that fit together, even if just 2 or 3 pieces, and worked to create a lot of partial fittings. My granddaughter and I looked at what everyone else did and mottled through trying to expand from their work. A few times, we switched chairs. With the new perspective the pieces to the puzzle suddenly fit in places we had not noticed before. Everyone had their own method to reach the same goal.

As your life coach, I help you find your method to reach your goal. I provide you with the tools you need make the decisions you require to get the job done. I walk with you on your journey toward your goal. I will remind you of your goal, your values, your priorities along the way when life’s detours and road hazards call your focus away from your destination. And, as your life coach I celebrate with you your successes.

Are you ready for a Life Coach? Ask yourself these questions:

• Do I want to grow and change?

• Have I made efforts to change within the past year?

• Am I capable of thinking about the future?

• Am I open to learning?

• Am I committed to making changes?

• Am I willing to learn from others?

• Am I willing to take risks?

• Am I willing to restructure my life if necessary?

If you answered YES to any these questions, you might want to consider connecting with Life Coach to help you as move forward. If this is something you are interested in learning about, I have some references for you from organizations I am associated with that may be of help.

Working ‘from the inside out’ what jigsaw puzzles are developing your life? What steps are you taking you need to clarify? Are there detours on your path you have not considered? Maybe it’s time to ask a life coach to help fill your toolbox.

You have the vision, and now you have tools to keep you focused on the direction, it’s time to begin the journey.

A New Perspective

I am a Star Trek fan; from the very first episodes in the 60s through Next Gen, Deep Space, Voyager and movies.

One of the many things that intrigues me about this Sci-Fi series is the various aspects they display about daily life.  A favorite episode in Next Generation is from season 6 titled “Timescape”.  Picard, Laforge, Data, and Troi return to the Enterprise via a shuttlecraft. They had been away to a conference. As they approach the Enterprise they find it and a Romulan ship frozen in time in what appears to be a battle.

They find a way to board the ships and by first appearance, the Romulans are taking the Federation ship hostage and it looks as if they are killing some of the crew.

Ever calm Captain Picard and his shuttlecraft crew find a way to turn time back a few seconds which shows them exactly what led to each presentation. In doing so, they see their perspective of what imaged happened is quite different than what actually happened.

Wouldn’t it be nice if we could freeze time to take a step back and then rewind to view all the details of a scene from different angles?

But, we can’t. I was talking with a teacher who works with kids before and after school. She was telling me how she has explained to her class why the 2nd person is the one that is ‘caught’. “The activity that triggered the event catches my attention” she explains, “but what I see is the response.” 

Several people can view the same event, and each come away with a different story because of the angle they viewed, their personal beliefs, and what they were doing/thinking at the time.  Everyone is right – from their perspective.

Several years ago some friends and I were looking at this picture I had hanging on a wall.

DadPrayOverSon

Each of us saw something different: I saw a parent praying over a child, another noticed the hand the man has on his son’s back because that is how her husband prays over their sons, the other woman noticed that guardian angel at the window (something I didn’t even notice until she pointed it out).

Each of us looked at the same picture, each saw something different.

How can you change your perspective about a situation you are facing?

  1. 1. Stop, take a deep breath, clear your mind.
  2. 2. Look around. Is there a piece you are missing or have not considered?
  3. 3. Ask others for their thoughts.

Everything is not as it seems. A new perspective may bring new meaning. You can’t turn back time, but you can step back and look again. What do you see from your new perspective?

What Color Do You See? A story of perspective

Several years ago a friend was visiting my home. We sat out on the back deck drinking iced tea and catching up on our lives.

During a lull in the conversation my friend commented on the pretty yellow roses along the fence line. I yellow_rose_sm_clrlooked out there. Yes, there were pretty roses I had worked hard to plant along the fence line, but they weren’t yellow. Thinking she probably just misspoke, I didn’t say anything. Conversation continued.

A bit later she mentioned the yellow roses again. “You want to see them up close?” I asked. We stepped off the deck and walked along the fence, looking at the various flowers. When we stopped at the roses I asked her what color they were, she again said yellow. At that point, I was really confused. We were looking at the same rose, from the same distance, and she was seeing a yellow rose where a red rose resided.

As I looked at her face I noticed her sunglasses. “Would you take off your sunglasses for a moment please” I red_rose_sm_clrasked. She did and quickly explained, “The rose is red!”

She was wearing a pair of sunglasses with a thick amber tint, altering the color viewed all around her. Once she removed the tinted lens, she could see clearly the red rose.amber_glasses

Working with a life coach can benefit by helping to change the lens you look through. A life coach will listen intently, ask powerful questions from your disclosure, and help you look at circumstances from another angle, with a different lens. This allows you to determine for yourself how you wish to proceed with a clear image and refocused path.

Is it time to ‘take off your tinted glasses’’