Some of my most frustrating moments come when I say ‘yes’ to something I wanted to say ‘no’ to.
Do you do the same? The journal prompt for this week asks “How do you feel when you do this?”
A hard lesson to learn was that ‘no’ is a complete sentence. It is okay to say ‘no’ and not give a long drawn out explanation as to why. Once I finally realized this, I was able to step further in my “Recovering People Pleaser” phase. I do slip back at times, but each time I am reminded why I learned to say ‘no’
By saying ‘no’ to things that stretch me beyond my coping skills, I can enjoy the times I say ‘yes’ more fully.
I was recently asked a question and struggled with the answer. That seemed like a perfect journal prompt.
This week I wonder I challenge you to “Describe yourself in 15 words or less”
I started by looking at an identity statement I made years ago. “I am a citizen of heaven (Heb 13:14), straining toward what is ahead (Phil 3:13), bearing witness of Christ (John 1:7), awaiting His return (1 Cor 1:7).
If I take out the Scripture references, I am at 18 words. And I wonder, does that describe me? It is my ultimate goal, but am I there?
I am a woman trying desperately to turn off the voices of the lies of the world and listen to God’s truth. Well, that is 22 words.
I am a woman living to encourage others to find their best within themselves. Hmmmm, I wonder.
I will keep working on this. What are you coming up with for yourself? If you are comfortable doing so, share in the comments below. Or send me an email – TerryAnn at TerryAnnPorter dot com. I’d love to hear your thoughts.
I did it again. I dropped the ball on something I was working on. I usually am on top of things. But this one slipped through the cracks. I immediately started the personal rant “I should not have this job” “I can’t do anything right” “I always screw things up”.
Well, that isn’t exactly true. I am very good at my job. I am also human. I am a wife, mother, grandmother, volunteer, homemaker……. Sometimes things slip. It doesn’t mean I am a failure, it simply means I failed in this one event.
Webster defines “abstract” as disassociated from any specific instance; and defines “absolute” as positive, unquestionable.
An “Abstract Absolute” occurs when you take one moment of non-success and make it into an ALWAYS.
Another example would be: I just messed up making dinner tonight. It didn’t turn out right. “I always do this. I cannot cook. I am a failure in the kitchen. I can’t even boil water!”
The truth in that scenario: I have fixed 3
meals a day without any problems for weeks/months/years. I had an issue
tonight. That’s all it is. Something went wrong tonight with this one meal. I
am a good cook who just didn’t fix a tasty meal this one time.
Have you spoken an Abstract Absolute to yourself? How do you step back and look at it accurately?
Something went wrong. You do what you can to fix. You move on. The incident failed, you are not a failure.
Think of ways to catch yourself using an Abstract Absolute in your speaking. Celebrate that you caught it. Move on. Watch the attitude of Absolute lessen over time.
I recently met an online friend for coffee. During our discussion, she asked about a time when I had excelled at something; a time when I had stepped out of my comfort zone. I told her about a knit and crochet bible study I created. I explained how it came about, then how I asked the women’s leadership of the church I was attending if we could try it the following semester. I was excited telling her the process and challenges and successes.
In recalling the story she then asked me what was stopping me from stepping outside my comfort zone and into the next creation I had on my heart.
Once I realized I had done it before, doing it again didn’t seem so difficult.
Celebrate something you excelled at in the past. What is stopping you from doing so again?
Whether you believe you can or can’t, you are correct. Mindset makes such a difference in everything we do.
With this in mind, this week my journal prompt leads me to looking at the word “failure” and asking the question, “Is it a subjective word (based on feelings and opinions) or an objective word (based on fact). Why?
“I didn’t know it was a dream.” That is what my friend Brenda said during our recent interview.
I met Brenda nearly 20 years ago. During this time we have walked with each other through miscellaneous highs and lows of life.
Today, Brenda has 2 local Tea Rooms and an Antique Mall. I sat down with her to discuss what fears she had to face and the courage it took to step out and into something she had mentioned in conversation for many years. She didn’t even realize it was a dream of hers.
Join me in the latest “Tea Time” video. This time you get more than just me talking. You get to hear from a woman who found the strength to seek out a ‘dream’.
Earlier this year I prompted the question ‘What would be the theme song of your life?’ For myself I had trouble coming up with one. I think I decided – at least for now – the song would be theme to the Mary Tyler Moore show. I love the words ‘you are going to make it after all’ . No matter what happens, I will make it.
Today then leads me to considering ‘What would the title of my life story be’ hmmm. I wonder.
While I am looking at my own thoughts, feel free to share yours in the comments below if you would like.
I stood in front of the mirror looking at me in a swimsuit. It was to be our first outing to the pool.
As I stared at my reflection those negative voices started in.
“You look like a beached whale”
“People are going to laugh at you”
“Are you really going out in public like that?”
Then my inner strength stepped up, ready for battle.
“What does it matter what they think?
“This is an outing with your husband, not the word”
“The people at the pool are there to enjoy the summer day, not look at what you are wearing”
“This is not a photo shoot!!!”
This is not a photo shoot. Wow. That certainly made me stop to think.
So many times I did not join in the fun because I thought I looked too fat, or too ugly, or the outfit I wore wasn’t flattering. “What will the others think” ruled my thoughts. I missed out on so much fun.
If others were busy talking about the weight I had gained or the outfit I wore, that was their problem. They, too, were missing out on the fun and the purpose of the gathering.
So I lathered on the sunscreen and stepped into the water. I glanced around. No one was looking at me. They were busy with their own lives, their families, their children. I was just someone passing by them into the waters they were heading into themselves.
Life is not a photo shoot, TerryAnn. Get out there and enjoy it.